Parenting the Preschooler: What does your child do well?

April 3, 2024 - Kylie Rymanowicz, <washi138@msu.edu> and <zoromski@msu.edu>,

Ages & Stages

Preschooler A child who is 3 to 5 years of age.

Young child A child who is 0 to 8 years of age.

Minding Our Language

Families come in all shapes, sizes, and styles. A “family” may include people who are related by blood, by marriage, and by choice. “Parents” may be biological, step-, foster, adoptive, legally appointed, or something else. When we use the words “family” and “parent” in these materials, we do so inclusively and with great respect for all adults who care for and work with young people.

When it comes to intelligence, most people think of how “book smart” someone is. But there are several other kinds of intelligence too, such as physical intelligence, relationship intelligence, and language learning intelligence. Children may have special skills in some or all of the different kinds of intelligence.

Each type of intelligence is important and shapes the person your child is now and who they will grow up to be. It is important to encourage your child as they develop in each type of intelligence. It is also important to take advantage of any learning opportunity you can, even when you’re doing everyday things like chores together. Try some of the following ideas to encourage your child as their ability, skills, and knowledge grow in each area.

Physical

  • Dance to different kinds of music. Try dancing really slow or really fast. Make up silly dance moves or copy one another’s moves.
  • Play catch. Use a soft ball or a rolled-up pair of socks that your child can easily grab onto. Gently toss it to your child and encourage them to toss it back.
  • Act like animals. Take turns moving like a favorite animal while the other person guesses which animal it is. Try moving like the animal without making any noise, too.

Time Alone

  • Give your child some space. Allow them to spend some time alone when they need it.
  • Set up an “alone space” just for them. Have your child help you choose and set it up. Place some pillows or a blanket there, and encourage them to bring stuffed animals, dolls, or books into the space if they wish.

Relationships

  • Talk to your child often. Ask them open-ended questions that call for more than a “yes” or “no” answer. (“What do you want to be when you grow up?” “Where in the world would you like to visit?”) Listen to their answers and ask more questions as they share their thoughts.
  • Join a playgroup. Encourage your child to spend time playing with other children. If you have family or friends nearby, plan a special playdate with them.

Language

  • Talk with your child and label everything often. The more words they hear you use, the more words they will learn!
  • Make up and tell stories together. Start off by saying the first line, and then have them say the next line. Take turns making up the story for as long as you can.
  • Practice saying tongue twisters with your child. Help them learn “She sells seashells by the seashore” and “Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.” Make up your own tongue twisters, too!
  • Use lots of words. Each time they learn a new word, try to give them at least three other words they could use in place of it. For example, if you see a spider with fuzz on it, tell them that it is hairy, fuzzy, and furry. Ask your child what other words they can think of to describe it, too.

Logical & Mathematical

  • Measure things together. Using a ruler or a tape measure, help your child measure different objects around the house and write down the measurements.
  • Put together puzzles as a team! You can use a store-bought puzzle or make your own puzzle by coloring and then cutting a paper plate or a piece of cardboard into smaller pieces. Encourage your child as the two of you work to put the puzzle together.

Environmental

  • Walk outside together. Look at trees, grass, snow, animals, or other natural objects or features and talk about what each of you sees.
  • Collect leaves. Encourage your child to keep their collection in an empty shoe box so they can look at it whenever they want to.
  • Garden together. Teach them how to plant a seed and water or weed a garden. If you don’t have a garden, let your child water and care for any indoor plants you have.

Space

  • Color together using every crayon in the box. Talk about each color as your child uses it.
  • Ask your child to tell you about a few of the illustrations in their favorite book. (“What is happening in the picture?” “What do you think is going to happen next?”)
  • Review their day. Ask your child to tell you about their favorite part of their day. If they have trouble remembering what they did, ask them simple questions that might help trigger their memories. (“What did you eat for breakfast?” “Did you wear your snow boots or your sandals to the park?” “Was Chantal at preschool today?”)

Musical

    • Sing their favorite songs with them. Encourage them to sing out loud throughout the day. Try singing really fast, really slow, really loud, or really quiet. Use silly voices when you sing. Sing like an opera star or make up a rap.
    • Form your own band using instruments you make from household items. Turn over a pot and hit it with a spoon for drums. Hum into an empty toilet paper or paper towel tube for a trumpet. Stretch rubber bands over an empty box to make a guitar. Make a shaker by placing dry beans into a reusable container or a plastic egg.

Find Out More

MSU Extension provides the following resources for parents and caregivers of preschoolers and young children at no or low cost. Be sure to check out these and other MSU Extension resources available at www.extension.msu.edu.

Extension Extras (https://bit.ly/2LC2vdX) – These compilations of news articles, activities, parenting tips and advice are published online Monday through Friday. The resources are designed for parents and caregivers of young children who are home all day during the novel coronavirus pandemic. Each day has a theme: Mindful Mondays, Tips on Tuesday, Working Wednesdays, Thinking Thursday, and Fun Fridays.

Extension Extras Enrichment Kits (https://bit.ly/35QAplQ) – These kits feature five or six early childhood activities with learning goals focused in areas such as social and emotional health, literacy, and STEM; a supply list; suggested children’s books; introduction letters explaining how to use the materials; and an evaluation. The kits are available as free downloads.

Early Childhood Videos (https://bit.ly/3ioyEkS) – These short videos offer parents and caregivers of young children information on parenting topics. Titles include “Perspective Taking,” “Family Movies,” “Goals of Misbehavior,” “Using Thinking and Feeling Words,” “The Waiting Game,” and “When Siblings Fight.”

Building Early Emotional Skills (BEES) in Young Children (https://bit.ly/38XW4KI) – This page provides links to a variety of free online parenting courses, workshops, and events offered by MSU Extension for parents and caregivers of young children aged 0 to 3.

Parenting the Preschooler: Social Competence and Emotional Well-Being © 2021 Michigan State University Board of Trustees. The fact sheets in this series may be copied for purposes of 4-H and other nonprofit educational programs and for individual use with credit to Michigan State University Extension.


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